If we’re all honest, there are probably times when we don’t feel loved by God—times of loss, or heartache, or disappointment. Sometimes it can feel like it’s a game of “He loves me, He loves me not.” When the news is good, when the promotion comes, when healing occurs: He loves me. When the news is bad, when disappointment comes, when disease progresses: He loves me not.
But try this little thought exercise: picture yourself playing that game using Jesus as the subject of who “loves me” or “loves me not.” Except don’t picture the game using a daisy (the traditional “loves me, loves me not” flower), picture playing that game with a plant that was part of the crucifixion, a crown of thorns. It’s really difficult to pluck off a thorn and say, “He loves me not.” Here is a truth we can count on: Jesus settled His love for us on the cross. No matter the ups and downs of life, we are relentlessly loved by Jesus. In fact, it’s during our loss and heartache that Jesus cuddles us just a bit more, like a parent with a sick child (see John 11, where we see Jesus snort-crying with His friends).
Take some time to reflect on Jesus’ act of love on the cross. First, use your imagination to take that act as personally as possible.
- Imagine Jesus’ eyes.
- Imagine your name rolling across His mind.
- Imagine His sacred blood pooling at the foot of the cross, creating puddles in the footprints from the soldiers.
Now, ask God this question and linger until something is impressed on your heart or mind. Journal what comes to mind.
God, how much do you love me?